This
morning while lying in my bed, slowly waking up, I found myself falling
into what could be called "default praying" - praying anxious prayers of
protection and well-being for my kids. Even in my early morning stupor, I began
to see the dysfunction in this prayer habit. As I had for so
many years, I was striving to build safe little cocoons to shelter, comfort and
keep each of my "peeps", as I
like to call my children and grandchildren. And, I sometimes still consider them MY
peeps - MY responsibility! It was if I was trying to surround them like
feathers in a nest to coddle and keep them - a warm and cozy nest full of blessings, healings
and protection.
Even Jesus
acknowledged the strong parental protective urge in Luke 13:34 as He expressed
His intense feelings toward Jerusalem.
“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and
stones those sent to her! How often I wanted to gather your children
together, just as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you
would not."
We all
know that the chrysalis has to work its way out of the cocoon to survive, and
the baby bird has to be thrown from the nest to fly. But as the eagle hovers
over its young, so there is one who promises to cover them with His feathers
and under whose wings they can trust. (Ps. 91)
But the security promised here is for those who trust fully in Him, the
One who is the hoverer. For those who commit themselves to Him. For those who
daily seek Him and dwell in His presence. Verse 14 goes on to say “Because he has
loved Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him securely on high, because he has known My
name."
I thought
I had long ago laid down the idol of the
"perfect Christian family" with perfectly protected and easy lives
for all. But, in the process of continuing to lay down that idol - perhaps it's time instead to pick up the
shield and buckler of His truth. Surely, keep praying for their safety, health
and happiness, but, even more than that, that each one learns to seek Him and to dwell in His presence daily. That
they seek His truth and commit themselves to His will and purpose for their lives.
Lord, are
my desires morphing more and more into Your desires? You did promise in Psalm
37 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and He will give you the desires
of your heart." As my own family
has grown, the "perception" (and it was always just a perception)
that I can control, even through prayer, every situation and possibility they
may face is no longer one I can reasonably expect to hold onto! It was never
reality anyway!
